We are in our 19th day with cloudy skies, though there was a brief sun beam spotted last Sunday (apt!) that lit up our stained glass windows at the beginning of services. Snow today and tomorrow night I think. But the bone cracking cold is gone for a while. Remarkable how warm the 20s feel now!
I am wrestling with one of the fabled deadly sins this morning. Wrestling is too strong. Feeling the tug. And it's the perhaps worst one, Envy. Cruising my Facebook page today I see my local mayor (whom I know personally) has been to DC and met the president. Cool. I shook the hand that shook the hand.
Then I remember how many people I know have met a president. Lots. But not me. For a while when I lived in NYC it seemed everyone had encountered a Clinton or a Bush sometime. "What, you've never met the president?" seemed to be the look in their eyes. Feeling left out and overlooked I felt the familiar moping that is Envy's greeting card.
Of the fabled sins, Greed and Gluttony and Lust have at least momentary pleasure, venal as it may be. Sloth and Pride and Wrath are harder on the sinner than those around him or her.
But Envy is just pathetic. Who confesses to envy, even to a priest? Envy has lurked about my hems most of my life. That you never noticed it means I have been fairly successful at dealing with it does not mean I am cured. Like an alcoholic, it requires constant vigilance.
But like those in recovery, it helps to say it out loud. "Hello, my name is Fred, and I envy. " Are you in the same group with me, or do you belong with another sin?
You can tell me. What happens in group stays in the group, right?